Canada's Got Talent Looking For Fall Guys

Canada's Got Talent is coming to Toronto so I took a look at the website and read the participant agreement/release. After all, I am a good act and at my age a novelty, definitely an asset to such a show if I say so myself and, now I'm retired, I have time.

I've read a few showbiz contracts and this one takes the cake. Words like arrogance, bullying, gotcha by the balls, exploitation and slavery come to mind as I read it. And on their part a complete abrogation of any responsibility whatever for anything.

It gives them specific permission to to make secret recordings backstage or anywhere and use them to make the participant look ridiculous. It gives them permission to use the participant's name, work, pictures and videos in future broadcasts, advertising, even merchandising without compensation. And it insists on using the term participant, not performer. Performers have to be paid.

No wonder Susan Boyle blew her top. I won't be signing it, I pity anyone who does.

London Bobby
Time traveller from the twentieth century.

I left my cash with Tony Bennett

To be fair, I bet he was heartbroken he didn't get to sing "I Left My Heart in San Francisco" for the Torontonians last night. About twenty minutes into his set it started to rain and the promoters, citing safety concerns for crew and audience, announced a ten-minute break to let the storm pass over. About forty-five minutes later, after a few more ten-minute delay announcements, they cancelled the show.

There had been a long intermission after Diana Krall's set with slow clapping from the crowd indicating impatience. If they had kept the intermission to twenty minutes perhaps the show would have been finished before the rain came. Presumably an outdoor theatre has a sharp eye on the weather so the long intermission was unconscionable. So we didn't get The Big Finish.

For James Taylor's show the previous week the parking was free, apparently prepaid by the promoters. For the Bennett/Krall show it was twenty dollars, this price not mentioned anywhere in the promo. Line-up to get into the parking was chaotic, about forty-five minutes. For twenty bucks a little more efficiency would be appreciated. More gates, better signage. And lower cost, this is not downtown.

While our theatre scene is quite vibrant, outside the theatres Toronto has some catching up to do. Nearly anywhere else in the world there is some place to eat after the show. I am not asking for fine dining but there must be something more civilized than Chinese takeaway or McDonald's drive-through. The chance of finding anything to eat near the Rexall Centre is particularly grim, it is a cultural oasis in an epicurean waste-land, about fifteen kilometres from downtown Toronto.

It is nice to see a live star in a live performance, but to tell the truth the theatre is so big I was watching the giant video screen most of the time. So is the cost, the parking, the line-ups, the driving, the weather uncertainty all worth it? Not really.

Bob Smtih
Time traveller from the twentieth century.

The Producers a smash hit in Fuengirola, Spain

Mel Brooks musical comedy 'The Producers' opened at Fuengirola's Salon Varietes Theatre on Friday March 25 for a twelve-day run. It was absolutely first class! The acting was terrific, the direction was expert, every clever witty line came across and the audience was roaring with laughter throughout.

I could nitpick about a couple of minor glitches with the scenery moving but I won't as this was the first night and I am sure it will be fixed by second night. What else can I complain about? The Mars bars sold by the charming usherettes melted in my pocket before I had a chance to eat them both.

The Salon Varietes Theatre is an English language theatre, the only one in Spain I believe. Where did they find these star performers? I don't know but I am going again closing night (Tuesday April 5), if I lived closer I would probably go mid-run as well. This is not to be missed.

This blog is called Bob's Daily Grumble so, alright; they will have to get better insulated wrappers for those Mars ice cream bars.

London Bobby
Time traveller from the last century.

Time Travellers from the last century

I'm glad I am not the only dinosaur on the block. The man with the best possible career as a pianist excluding Iturbi and Liberace is Sid Wright, still active and starring in "The Three Pianists" concert. He is 89 and not a household name but worked in London solidly and simultaneously on radio, TV and in clubs for half a century.

I have just reconnected with my favourite entertainer of the 70s, Adam Timoon. Here he is playing Malagueña just a few weeks ago. He use to pack Adam's Inn at the Seaway Hotel when I was working at the Barmaid's Arms, both Toronto hotspots. Click here: Adam - Malaguena

London Bobby

Time traveller from the last century

When is it time to quit?

I have seen video of great artists performing when they were really past it, disappointing and somewhat upsetting when their previous great performances are still fresh in your memory. So I try to monitor myself. Voice: not too bad, appearance: not bad considering extreme age, piano technique: not as slick as it was, memory: senior moments occur, comedy: good! stage movement: lousy. So I had a committee meeting with myself and decided if impresarios still want to pay me, if anybody still wants to see me, I would still perform. So I am back in Toronto and not retired yet. My next gig is at the Nexus Piano Bar in Brampton, it is a particularly good restaurant in my humble opinion.

http://www.nexusfinefoods.com/

Fine dining at a reasonable price, nice ambience, a large saltwater aquarium and a grand piano, it's hard to beat the Nexus Piano Bar. I'll be playing there Thursday, Friday and Saturday this week, 6:30 to 9:30PM.

I would be tickled pink if you come.

The Three Pianists Concert

No grumble today except, perhaps, that my video camera is about three generations out of date in, it seems, about two years. The vicar's wife bravely held the heavy old Sony Camcorder for an hour to make this video. Thank you, Jette, and we excuse the shaky bits and love the selection of shots.

The Three Pianists Concert

It worked! How can I tell you about this and still be my usual humble self? We were sold out and the audience gave us a standing ovation. That's it. Now it is over I can relax.

Heather Bellene was most impressive, she gave a faultless performance. Sid Wright was loveable as he gave us a review of his life in music. I bumbled about in the beginning but got into my stride quite quickly because the audience was so supportive. I suppose, living in Spain, they must be starved for entertainment in their own language. They were wonderful to play to.

So we made money but, to tell you the truth, I enjoyed this so much I would have paid for the privilege to do it. Now for the next concert...

The Three Pianists

Never mind The Three Tenors, have you heard The Three Pianists? Artists are Sid Wright, accompanist to the stars who was at the Talk of The Town in London for sixteen years, Heather Bellene, concert pianist and London Bobby, pub pianner basher. First concert will be in Spain, Mijas Costa, Friday January 29. Right now, five days to go, busy with last minute promotion, rehearsal and production details. Nice feature article in The Costa del Sol News with this picture nicely displayed. More details: www.thethreepianists.com